The Perfect Way to Say You Understand – For Condolences or Just to Honor a Great Relationship
When someone you know has lost their beloved fur angel, finding the right words can be difficult. Some people don’t get it—the depth of the loss. But if you do understand, you’ll appreciate this awesome find. Heart Speak Message Cards are handmade and say it all so perfectly and beautifully, you’ll no doubt be quite moved when you read them. They make their cards in two versions: “In Spirit” for pets who have passed on, and “Celebrating the Journey” to acknowledge the current bond between a pet parent and their beloved pet. The writing is so beautiful (positive and heartwarming), the images are precious, and the cards are soft and rich to touch, each printed on handmade paper with handmade envelopes. I’ve already sent out two, and anticipate sending many more. For sympathy or celebration, this is a site you’ll want to bookmark.
Why You SHOULD Consider Yourself Your Dog’s Parent
Anthropomorphosis means “translation into human form.” Tell someone you consider yourself your dog’s parent and they may accuse you of anthropomorphism. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
As the brilliant author, researcher, and professor, Temple Grandin, says in her book, Animals Make Us Human:
“What dogs probably need isn’t a substitute pack leader but a substitute parent. I say that because, genetically, dogs are juvenile wolves, and young wolves live with their parents and siblings…Dog owners do need to be the leader, but not because a dog will become ‘alpha’ if they don’t. Dog owners need to be the leader the same way parents do. Good parents set limits and teach their kids how to behave nicely, and that’s exactly what dogs need, too.”
She goes on to explain that the evolutionary process of dogs resulted in their being developmentally arrested, so to speak, at a young age. Less like a wolf, more like a wolf cub. As such, they need parents to guide, protect, and care for them. This is not ‘humanizing’ the dog. Rather, it is an accurate and appropriate behavior response to an animal that has been bred to retain it’s puppy-like characteristics, so as to better co-exist with humans.
You can read all about this in greater detail in Ms. Grandin’s book. But for now, know that the love, guidance, and trusting, responsible care you provide your dog is absolutely the right thing to do.
A Dog Parent’s Dream List of Gifts
With all the lists out there for holiday gifts, here’s one more to consider. These are products that I’ve either tried or thoroughly researched (and plan on buying). Seriously wonderful finds. You and your pups deserve it.
1. Custom Doggie Illustrations by Animator, Lili Chin
By Lili Chin
It was serendipity. I was at the most awesome Clicker Expo last January and happened to be sitting next to a really sweet person who happened to be Lili Chin. She gave me her card and I knew (having been in the commerical arts for a lonnnnnng time) that this was one seriously talented illustrator.
Her illustrations are gorgeous, cartoon-like, sweet, perfect. She’s an animator, too, which partially explains the talent level. Her custom illustrations are priced according to number of doggie subjects (1 dog=$100, 2 dogs=$160, etc.). Get one. You’ll love it. Get one for someone else’s pup. They’ll love it.
2. A Custom Blanket from Photoweavers
A sample of a throw by PhotoWeavers
If it wouldn’t ruin a surpise, I’d post a photo of the great throw I ordered from Photoweavers. Can you just imagine how someone would feel receiving a soft, cotton, woven throw with the image of a beloved dog on it? Not just any dog, THEIR dog! And if the gift is for someone who’s beloved pup has passed on… well, you can imagine how well that would go over. No words necessary. Love this. Cost is $129. And you’ll save 30% if you use this code: FRIENDSANDFAMILY at PhotoWeavers.com.
3. The book: Don’t Shoot the Dog! The New Art of Teaching and Training by Karen Pryor.
Don't Shoot the Dog by Karen Pryor
Ignore the title and check out this brilliant read about the science of learning. “Karen Pryor is a scientist with an international reputation in two fields: marine mammal biology and behavioral psychology. Through her work with dolphins in the 1960s, she pioneered modern, force-free animal training methods.” That’s from her website, Reaching the Animal Mind. She’s also the creator of Clicker Training.
First published in 1984, this is the SCIENCE of learning. It’s real, it works, and it’s beneficial to both you and your companion animals. Don’t be trapped in the dark ages with ‘whispering’ and ‘dominance’ and ‘pack leader’ folklore. Give this book to someone you love.
4. Cow Udder Liners Make Great Dog Toys?
Helping Udders Tug Toy
Here at Dog Parent, we love companies that support rescue organizations. And through DailyKibble, we found out about a company that makes the coolest dog toys out of recycled udder liners! Helping Udders takes the previously discarded rubber liners that are used in commercial milking factories and turns them into doggy toys for chewing, tugging, and general doggy fun.
They come in all shapes and sizes (for all shapes and sizes of dogs), some have ropes attached, some incorporate bungees. And when you buy these cool toys from Helping Udders, you get to choose which rescue will receive a part of the purchase price. They have a huge list of rescue organizations on their site, and, to date, more than $170,000 has been donated. Now how cool is that?
5. Always in Your Heart, for Sure
Always in My Heart pendant from Humane Domain
The Humane Society of the US has an online shop called Humane Domain. We found this beautiful heart-shaped pendant necklace that can be personalized with your fur angel’s name on the back. On the front, the heart-shaped pendant says “Always in my heart” with a paw print. So precious!
It’s available in pewter ($19.50) or sterling silver ($59.50), and the name engraving on the back is included in the price. The chain is a 20” cable style. Who wouldn’t love this gift?
6. How Many Bowls of Food will Your Purchase Fund?
A jewelry find at The Animal Rescue Site
The Animal Rescue Site is part of The Greater Good Network, and helps fund non-profits that are working for animal causes. Their shop sells an adorable line of signature paw print products.
We’ve been shopping at The Animal Rescue Site for years and have never been disappointed by the quality and great prices on their jewelry and accessories. Plus, they calculate the aid provided in terms of “bowls of food funded.” Check out the Paw Print jewelry, accessories, and clothing. You’ll probably become a regular, happy customer.
Fact vs. Folkore
When it comes to training, some people pass off folklore as fact. “My grandfather did it this way, my father did it this way, I do it this way. It works.” That may appear to be true…on the surface.
With the cultural phenomenon of “dog whispering,” we’re lead to believe that there is a simple yet mystical path to gaining CONTROL over your dog. By providing discipline, exercise and affection, we’re lead to believe that our canine companion will be happy and obedient.
That may appear to be what’s happening, at the moment, to the humans. But from the dog’s point of view? Things are very different. By suppressing a desire to act, the dog avoids punishment. That creates an antagonistic relationship…and temporary results.
My Karen Pryor Clicker Training has begun, and it’s so refreshing to be learning the SCIENCE of learning. All living beings with nervous systems have the capacity to learn. Whether fish or fowl, canine or human, or anything in between, we all have the ability to learn, to modify our behavior. And through positive reinforcement (also called operant conditioning), we learn best. But what’s most exciting is the actual process of learning.
Contrary to the out-dated dominance theories that would tell us that dogs are all about pack order, we now know, scientifically, that their existence is quite different, more complex, than that over-simplified trendy talk would have us believe. While wolves in the wild do place a bit more importance on pack order as a necessary means of survival, our canine companions are different. Their interaction with us is like a dance, and they are following our lead, responding to what makes us happy, deferring to what makes us angry. They speak to us and react to us. It’s our job to listen.
